During my abusive relationship, I refused to leave more times than I can count. When I did leave, I soon returned. The justification that I gave to myself, and others, for this? Well, I loved him, of course!
I really didn’t feel capable of living without him. I was miserable, frightened, and angry at myself – and him – every time I let it go. I didn’t understand how I could love someone who treated me so appallingly. What was wrong with me, I wanted to know? Was I really so crazy I thought this was a normal expression of love? Why was I seemingly prepared to sacrifice so much – my hopes, dreams, financial security, and sense of self – to stay in what I knew was a destructive relationship?
It is only after getting out – struggling with feelings of grief and missing him so madly I thought…
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